The Misadventures of one Hermione Granger
by And.then.the.expected
Summary: Hermione finds her time-turner, but is interrupted by Draco for dinner. She accidentally breaks the time-turner and is sent to 2018. A land where the slang, if unfamiliar with it, is impossible to decipher.
1. Why do bad things happen to good people?

**A/N: Many parts of this story belong to JKR, as is the case with all of us. Enjoy**

Why do bad things always happen to good people?

It wasn't generally Hermione Granger who chose to break the rules. She'd break them, of course, but that was usually after thorough convincing from Harry and Ron. She was a good person. No, she _is _a good person. So why? Why had she kept the time turner after all this time? She thought back to the events leading to the discovery of the offending item.

Naturally, she had been made Head Girl after returning to repeat her seventh year. Having her own dorm room could be quite lonely, but the privacy was nice. She had already completed her studies for the night, but it wasn't quite time for dinner. Three months into the year, she decided with her free time that her residence was permanent enough to finally unpack her trunk.

She had already transferred her clothing into her wardrobe and was midway through relocating her books to the provided shelves. She removed a copy of _The Essential Defense Against the Dark Arts _by Arsenius Jigger. She hadn't read through the book since her third year, but it was always practical to study the fundamentals as everything else was built off it. As she removed the book, she noticed that it was not fully closed. She opened the book to find the cause of the issue. She was greeted with the sight of her old time-turner. It had been misplaced for so long that she believed that she had returned it.

_Why hadn't they asked for it back? _She sat on her bed contemplating what to do with the time-turner. _Should I return it? Well, this was the last one. Wouldn't they want it back? But the ministry lost all of the others, could they really be trusted with the last one? If I can keep this a secret, then I don't have to make the decision now. _

She stood to place the item in a drawer of her desk. There was a knock on her door.

"Granger, it's time for dinner. If you don't come now, you'll miss it."

"I'm going Malfoy. Just give me a minute."

They had grown since the war. She wouldn't necessarily call them friends, but they could now make it ten minutes in the same room without a disagreement. Even then, their disagreements held less detestation. It was progress.

She hurried to drop the time-turner in a drawer, but she missed it by a millimeter. She could only stand by and watch as the time-turner plummeted to the ground, shattering into just enough pieces to ruin her chances of enjoying the evening. She felt a disagreeable pull to her stomach similar to that of a Portkey. _Maybe I was the one that couldn't be trusted with the time-turner. _And then she was met with the anticipated darkness that could only mean she had fainted.


	2. Minor Inconvenience

**Chapter Two**

**Minor Inconvenience**

She awoke in the Head Girls chambers, but it wasn't the same as it was when she fell asleep. She picked herself off the floor and began to inventory the lengths that Malfoy would go through to prank her. Instead of the grand bookcase she remembered there was a short shelf of sixth or so books. _Newts are just around the corner and he chooses to waste our time on practical jokes. Typical boy._

She walks out of the Head Girl's chamber down to the common room. "Alright Malfoy. I'm done with your prank. I need to go back to studying, so fix my room." She ordered loudly as she began to walk towards his door. She knocked on his door. "Malfoy!"

"What?" Came a voice from the portrait hole.

Hermione turned toward the voice. She found the origin of the voice, a girl who had just entered the common room.

"You aren't Malfoy. Who are you?"

"Actually, I am. And I don't know who you think you are," she barked condescendingly. She straightened herself out marching right towards Hermione. She drew her wand and pointed it directly at Hermione. "I think the question is, who are you and what do you think you're doing in _my_ common room?"

'Malfoy' stood four inches taller than Hermione. It wasn't enough to intimidate Hermione, but it was enough to force Hermione to look up at her.

"Hilarious." Hermione drawled. "Tell Malfoy his joke is an absolute knee slapper. _Really _funny. If we're finished here, and we are, I'd ask that you leave. And shut the door on the way out if you'd be so kind." Hermione finished, her voice dripping of fake friendliness.

"Listen here _sister_, as I said before, this is my common room. Get out."

"Where's McGonagall?"

"You think she'll side with you? I am the head girl _and _her goddaughter, so maybe you should reconsider where you're throwing your shade."

_Throwing my shade? What does that even mean?_

At Hermione's silence, the girl continued. "Fine. We'll go see Aunt Minnie." She returned her wand to the pocket of her robes and grabbed Hermione's wrist. She set about dragging Hermione through the castle to the Headmasters office. With a quiet whisper of the password, they are soon standing before Minerva McGonagall. It seemed to Hermione that McGonagall had aged significantly from her class this morning.

"Aunt Minnie, I found this girl in the Head Common Room, and she's absolutely insane."

McGonagall turned her eyes towards Hermione, and her face pulled into a tight smile. She waited for McGonagall to confirm that Malfoy had created this elaborate prank to ruin her evening. Instead, she received an "Oh dear." and McGonagall turned back to Octavia. "Octavia, you can return to whatever you were doing previously. I will handle it. See you at dinner." Octavia grumbled, but left quickly.

Hermione watched her retreating figure. _Okay, maybe she looked _a little _like a Malfoy with the bright blonde, but her hair was far too curly and her skin far too tanned._

"Hello, Hermione." McGonagall greeted reverting Hermione's attention back to her. "So the fated day has finally come."

"Fated day? Where am I?"

"No, Hermione. Not where but when."

Hermione took a moment to process the new information before she quipped. "Really, Professor? I thought better of you. The cliche 'where are we. no, when are we'. For shame." She looked around the room. "Also, where's Professor Dumbledore? In this time, he supposed to be the headmaster."

"And what time is that, Miss Granger?"

"The 1970's, of course."

"Ms Granger, we aren't in the 70's. Whatever gave you that idea?"

"The fashion." Hermione thought back to Lavendar and Parvarti's obnoxiously loud discussions of fashion eras. From what she had seen from Octavia this most certainly was the 70's. Crop tops, high-waisted shorts, and all the denim. Classic indicators the era. "Though, that doesn't explain why I don't recognize the name Octavia Malfoy."

"Ms Granger, this is 2018" she corrected.

"No. Then that girl…" Hermione threw herself down into the closest chair.

"My goddaughter, Octavia Malfoy."

"Malfoy made _you _her godmother?" She snorted.

"Not Draco, but his wife."

Hermione shrugs, but begins explaining what lead to her arrival. "The time-turner. I can't believe I was such an idiot." She looked to McGonagall. "I found an old time-turner in my trunk while unpacking. I was putting it away when I dropped it and it broke. Can you send me back?" Hermione asked hopefully.

"Well dear, there are currently zero functioning time-turners in all of Wizarding Britain, but I could take a look and reach out to some old colleagues and check if they have any ideas," McGonagall suggested.

"Thank you so much."

"Did you reveal your identity to Octavia?"

"I did not. I was a little more concerned with someone pretending to be a Malfoy, which I guess that isn't the case anymore."

"Oh good." McGonagall smiled. "I am unsure of how long it will take to return you to your time, so for the time being you will be a student. Do you have a name that you would prefer to go by as all students recognize 'Hermione Granger'?"

"I think, Ophelia. Ophelia Alderton."

"We should also make minor adjustments to your appearance." McGonagall set about casting a subtle glamour that should obscure her identity, but wouldn't totally change her from what Octavia had seen earlier. "You will be sorted at dinner in an hour, and for ease of access a bedroom will be added off the Head's Common Room for you. I will call Octavia and Alfred, the Head Boy, here to formally meet you and then give you a tour. I know you don't need it, but it would seem suspicious otherwise."

"Thank you, Professor."


End file.
